These classifieds actually ran in a Minneapolis newspaper - a smile for your day....
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER: - 8-years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites!
FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog..
FREE PUPPIES: Mother, AKC German Shepherd. Father, Super Dog. able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG: Looks like a rat. Been out a while. Better be a big reward.
COWS: NEVER BRED: Also 1 gay bull for sale..
NORDIC TRACK: $300 Hardly used, call Chubby.
GEORGIA PEACHES: California grown - 89 cents/lb.
JOINING NUDIST COLONY! Must sell washer and dryer $300.
WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE: Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie.
And the best one?:
FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed, Got married last month. Wife knows everything.